It’s 7:49 am, I’m here at work thinking to myself that I have a lot to say. The problem with all of these things I have to say, is that I’m not sure how to say them. I mean I get it figured out in my head and then I put it down, look it over and it doesn’t look right. I have a lot to say, and I’m not sure how to say it. I have some issues to work through, and communication will certainly help that but if I can’t even put it in a way that makes sense without a lot of extra explanation… I’m not sure I can really pass the information to someone else.
It’s 7:52 am, and I’m a little sick to my stomach. I don’t think I ate too much, but lately I’ve been off kilter physically. One day I’ll have a sore throat and a cough, the next day the cough and sore throat will be replaced by a stuffed up nose, the following day it’s my stomach but nothing else. I wonder if I could be experiencing a cold one symptom at a time… and then I have to wonder if I’m the only one this has happened to. I don’t particularly like it, but at least I can come to work with all of these symptoms one at a time, if I got them all at once I’d have to take at least one sick day. So there is that.
It’s 7:55 am, and I’m happy with a lot of things in my life right now. I’ve got a new friend who I think the world of and I have since I met them. I’ve been less hungry lately, which has led to a small drop in my weight. I’ve taken to weighing myself each morning and over the last few days I’ve lost a pound or two each day. Monday I was at 324, this morning I was at 321.6. If I could find some motivation to exercise, I think I could make a much better go at this whole losing weight thing. A combination of these things, and a general lack of annoyance at work have all really put me into a good mood. For the last week or so, I’ve been pretty happy with everything. I know I still need work, but this is a welcome development.
It’s 7:58 am, and the idea of getting out of Utah is still buzzing around in my head. Nebraska is still a top contender for a landing spot, but so is Ohio, West Virginia and as always Pennsylvania. I need to do some more self exploration, as well as some emotional exploration of others. Partially to figure out if I’m really in need of familial and other support or if I’m better off going alone. Whether I’m traveling alone or if someone wants to come with me. Never mind the other research that would need to be done if I am to continue my professional development as well as my scholastic endeavors. So, while the idea appeals to me… it’s far from reality.
It’s 8:05 am, and maybe it’s more than one symptom today. My stuffy nose has come back, I’m not happy about that. I’m also incredibly fatigued, I didn’t sleep as well last night as I have the rest of the week thus far so maybe that’s playing a role in how I feel. There’s a nice headache too, this is terrible really. I can’t let it get me down. I have a job to do, people are depending on me. So it’s not like I can just up and leave and go home to rest. Even though, I’m sure the manager would let me go. Maybe I’ll look into it, once I see how many sales reps we have in today. One rep was out yesterday, so she may be out again today.
It’s 8:10 am, and I’m thinking I’m really pretty awesome. I’m also thinking that the song of the day today is “Born Free” by Kid Rock. Have a great day everyone.